when things are not easy, they look like today

OH my goodness. It has been a rough first several days back in school. Let’s start this post with a deep breath in… aaand out. Also let’s get a nice picture up here for good measure.

[Side note: that’s not my picture; I found it on flickr. Other side note: WHY doesn’t everyone love cats? People who hate cats are just people who haven’t had enough experience with cats. CATS ARE SO COOL. Think about how much cooler a TIGER is than a WOLF.]

Like I said, it’s been a rough week. Agh. Every time I think I’ve got one thing somewhat under control, something else pops up that is so not under control. And then once I get that thing under some control, something else totally unrelated demands my time, focus, mental energy. And each thing that comes up seems to call my name very last-minute-like, shouting, “AH!!! Don’t forget about me!!!! I’m about to fall apart!!! You need to attend to this very big problem now!!!”

Now of course, each thing is probably not accurately classified as a “very big problem,” but when many important things are dive-bombing you at once, they feel like very big problems. “TUITION IS CHANGING!!! DID YOU FIGURE THIS OUT WITH YOUR SCHOLARSHIP PEOPLE?!?!” “AH!! TURNS OUT YOU HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW!!! ARE YOU READY?!?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ABOUT YOUR FUTURE?!?!?!” “YOUR PRECEPTOR IS BUSY!!! WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO START CLINICAL, WEEK 5?!?!?!” “OH MY GOODNESS, YOU ARE HAVING 35 PEOPLE TO YOUR HOUSE THIS WEEKEND, ARE YOU READY?!?!?!” “YOUR FIRST EXAM IS NEXT WEEK!!! ARE YOU STUDYING?!?!?!” “YOU ARE PLANNING A RETREAT!!! DID YOU REMEMBER TO EMAIL THOSE PEOPLE?!?!” “SMALL GROUP STARTS NEXT WEEK!!! DID YOU FIGURE OUT ALL THE DETAILS?!?!” “YOU ARE LEAVING THE COUNTRY IN 9 DAYS!!! WHERE ARE YOU SENDING THE DOG?!?!?!” “SPEAKING OF THE DOG, HE HAS MAJOR ISSUES!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ABOUT THAT?!?!?!” “YOU GOT CALLED OFF AGAIN!!! HOW ARE YOU GOING TO PAY FOR THINGS THIS YEAR?!?!” “YOUR HOUSE IS FALLING APART!!! YOU NEED TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO FIX IT!!!”

Lord. Have. Mercy. I can’t shut my mind up. Shut up, mind! Relax, self!!! WHY are you acting like a crazy person?!?! Yikes. I am trying to breathe and relax like a normal sane calm person, but my mind is just not having it this week. I found this today:

Thou hast produced and sustained me, saved and kept me. Thou art in every situation able to meet my needs and miseries. Keep me walking steadfastly toward the country of everlasting delights, that paradise-land which is my true inheritance. 

Then my dad texted me and my mom (on her way to pick him up from the airport) called me. As I was in the middle of typing this post, just to see how I was doing. If that’s not the Holy Spirit doing his part to care for me, I don’t know what is. How do people live without Jesus? Seriously, how do people make it through this world without leaning on Christ?

Prayers. Deep breaths. Prayers. Deep breaths. Rinse and repeat. There’s the strategy. Oh, and love from the people God has given me, like mom and dad. Because my true inheritance is a country of everlasting delights, a paradise-land. Thank you, Lord.

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One comment

  1. Jean Moore · September 18, 2012

    Love to you my sweet Bear and thank you Lord that He has you in His everlasting arms. He promises to give you more than you can ask or imagine. I look forward to hearing of His provision!!

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